Tuesday, May 09, 2006


What does it take to stop? If something is bad for one's well-being, and this knowledge is known by the addict, how does he quit? How does he quit a habit he's been continuing for years and years? The addict wishes to quit. He firmly desires to quit. Yet in the face of adversity, his will crumbles... Perhaps this takes brokenness... the type of brokenness that makes you realize that we're not in control... That our lives will eventually spiral out, or we'll end up going crazy if we don't direct our addictions to the proper authorities. But what I just said, "directing our addictions to the proper authorities," one grows weary of authority. Ever since the day a child is spanked, operant conditioning tells her that in order to receive good things, you do good. If you do bad things, you receive bad. Based on this meritocracy, how are we to trust that we are loved, despite our cesspool of lies, hurt and burdens? I'm learning myself.... one day at a time. Thank you, Jesus.


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